State Fair Fashion…or…Things that make you go hmmm…

I have been spending a fair amount (“fair” get it?) at the Indiana State Fair in the Homes for Heros booth with the team from Inlanta Mortgage and I have seen way more boobs and butt cracks than anyone should be subjected to!  Just a few tips to follow when going to a FAMILY event in warm weather…

1.  Wear clothes that fit, but breathe and move…maxi dresses can be a great option, but please, buy a size that fits which means ladies, that it should completely cover your breast and be loose enough that it is not vacuum sucked to your body.

2.  Men, PULL UP YOUR PANTS!  I have no desire to see your underwear or worse!  Hasn’t anyone every told you that women would prefer to see a fitted pair of jeans on a male backside?  My favorite are the guys who literally have to hold their pants up with one hand while they are walking because they are so far down…what if they needed to run?  Look up the origin of this style…bet you pull them up after that!

3.  Leave the rubber flip-flops at home, these aren’t really shoes.  Let’s face it, you are at a state fair, looking at the world’s biggest pig, he’s not going to be impressed with your shoes!  I am the shoe queen, if i’m going to be out walking around, I wear good, solid shoes, but if I’m standing around a booth, usually wearing something cute with a heel!

4.  If you are wearing a long top, make sure your shorts are longer than your top…I have seen several that looked like there was nothing underneath…maybe their wasn’t, but I don’t want to know.

5.  Pay attention to what your T-shirt slogan says…this is a family event and some of you are nasty!

6.  Ladies, tiny T-shirts and short short short shorts are not appropriate, I don’t like seeing cheeks hanging out and I’m sure the parents there with their small children don’t like having to explain why you have no respect for yourself.

Okay…those are my tips…and my rant for today!  I hope everyone enjoys the fair!  Oh…and for those needing a little guidance, What Not To Wear returns on TLC, Friday night at 10 for their final season…

WNTW

Vicki Reed

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